And what a happy Friday it is! Why is Friday so good? Because it's the end of the workweek? Sure, why the fuck not...but really, it's all about the break time. Kick your feet up tonight and don't let them touch the pavement. You ain't doing shit today because it's a DAY OFF! Rest, play video games, eat, go see a movie, masturbate, milk a cow, beat your spouse - I don't care two rats' asses what you decide to do with your spare time. Enjoy it.
Now, I'm not going to update this stupid thing this weekend, and very likely not at all over the course of any weekends, so here's your schedule:
Saturday: walk for 25 minutes
Sunday: walk 2 miles
Now, I know what you're saying: "Hey, you fat fuck, what do you mean walk 2 miles?! We were dealing with TIME not DISTANCE!" I hear you retards out there, and let me tell you that for here, now, and forever your Sundays are your BIG distance days. We're going to change our schedule a teeny bit next week, too. Monday (since they blow goats anyway) will be the new day off. Studies show that people are more willing to accept a new task on the first day of the week...and now that I have you drooling bastards in my LASER SIGHTS I'm going to change things next week since you have tentatively established a habit. I will also post the ENTIRE week's schedule on Sunday night/Monday morning and will change the format here to more of a helping/tips/tricks/blowjobs layout.
My final thought: if you're dragging your feet and walking slowly, FUCKING STOP IT! Kick it up a notch. If you're not trying, you're dying.
Is there an approximate speed we should be aiming for?
ReplyDeleteWhy? Do you have somewhere you need to be? When training or during the marathon itself, your goal is simply TO FINISH.
ReplyDeleteBut, if you're really that concerned, my definition of "not dragging ass" is walking at 2.5 mph (obese/injured) to 4.0. You're walking hard and really pushing yourself. You've likely broken a sweat. Your walk should not be defined as "leisurely." If you can walk faster, do it!
Its not that I was that concerned, you told me to "FUCKING STOP IT" if I was "dragging my feet". Just making sure I understand what you mean quantitatively.
ReplyDelete