You were supposed to walk 2 miles yesterday. You didn't. I know. Don't worry, though, it's fine. I didn't want to see you on marathon day. You know a marathon is on some old guy's bucket list, right? Some monumental (emphasis on the mental) accomplishment that only the stalwart can accomplish? You go ahead and sit on the couch, fuck off, and die. I'm not here to help YOU, I'm here to help marathoners, runners, finishers, and at the very least doers.
For the rest of you that actually did something with contacting your feet to the pavement for a couple miles, it's time for you to do nothing. Stay active if you can, keep your body moderately active, and DON'T RUN! You'll have plenty of time for that...next week. SURPRISE, BITCHES! Here's your schedule for the next week:
Monday: REST, I just fucking said it, don't make me repeat myself
Tuesday: walk 25 min
Wednesday: walk 35 min
Thursday: walk 25 min
Friday: REST AGAIN!
Saturday: walk 25 min
Sunday: walk 2.5 miles!
If I see my traffic dip I'm going to post only a few days at a time so you mental fuckers keep coming back. Because, let's face it, this marathon may be the stupidest thing you'll ever do. Tomorrow, some tips to make sure you asshats finish.
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