Hey crackers (because no self-respecting person of a non-Caucasian influence wouldn't be caught reading a RUNNING BLOG)! Did you have too much to drink the night before? Good job. Way to introduce toxins into an athletic training regimen...toolbag.
Toss back too many G&Ts or sake bombers (again, all whitey drinks)? Chug some water and take it easy on your run. The first day you take off to not run and "recover" is the first day you tell yourself it's OK to skip a run because you did it to yourself (this sentence made NO sense to me, either. Good luck.). It's an excuse, and not a very good one. If you feel you can't do the full run, make that decision AFTER you start, not before. You're in your third week and you're already setting yourself up for failure by skipping out. Don't reschedule on your day off. Your day off is meant to be a day off. Shameful.
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Showing posts with label pain/injury. Show all posts
Showing posts with label pain/injury. Show all posts
Tuesday, August 2, 2011
Tuesday, July 26, 2011
Walking in your shoes
You've been walking an awful lot lately. In fact, if you took a large step back an analyzed what you've done so far, you should be look at approximately a little over five miles. Can you believe soon you're going to be doing that in one day? I didn't think that thought even entered your minds. Next week, you'll be walk-running your fist 5k. I'll sit here and let that stew for a moment...
Done?
OK. You aren't going to make it you're fucking up your feet with every step you take. Now you can go somewhere and have some 17-year old pigfucker "analyze" your gait and try and sell you a $150 pair of shoes it cost a Korean kid 12 cents to make, OR you can pay some goddamned attention to yourself.
Walk for a little while. Don't walk "proper" - walk like you always have. Now look at yourself, man!
Do the balls of your feet touch the ground early (do you walk like a velociraptor?)
Do you step flat-footed like Neanderthal Man across the plains while hunting and gathering?
Does your heel hit first then you roll your feet all the way to your toes as a marching band flunkie would do?
Do you put more pressure on your left than your right because you were built in God's image and that image is LOPSIDED?
And above all else, does it hurt when you walk? Not like you're dreadfully obese and the pressure actually causes pain because of your enormous bulkitude, but are you getting blisters or do your toes hurt or maybe your heel?
I can't tell you exactly how to fix it, but maybe you are walking/running "wrong." In this same vein, there is no "right," either. Only you know what is going to work for you, but above all else you should not hurt. Being a marathoner is a fucking brutal hobby to pick up (seriously, were you out of stamps or coins?) but being a marathoner that is deliberately and ignorantly hurting themselves is downright retarded.
This week, and especially today on your 25 minute WALK (you'll run next week, be patient), pay attention to how you walk and if you experience pain. Make strides (FUCKING PUNNY, BITCHES!!!) to endure NO pain when you walk. Questions on how to get that done? There's a comments section below - but you all don't know that because I've only seen one fucking comment. This is about community, you mouth-breathers!
Done?
OK. You aren't going to make it you're fucking up your feet with every step you take. Now you can go somewhere and have some 17-year old pigfucker "analyze" your gait and try and sell you a $150 pair of shoes it cost a Korean kid 12 cents to make, OR you can pay some goddamned attention to yourself.
Walk for a little while. Don't walk "proper" - walk like you always have. Now look at yourself, man!
Do the balls of your feet touch the ground early (do you walk like a velociraptor?)
Do you step flat-footed like Neanderthal Man across the plains while hunting and gathering?
Does your heel hit first then you roll your feet all the way to your toes as a marching band flunkie would do?
Do you put more pressure on your left than your right because you were built in God's image and that image is LOPSIDED?
And above all else, does it hurt when you walk? Not like you're dreadfully obese and the pressure actually causes pain because of your enormous bulkitude, but are you getting blisters or do your toes hurt or maybe your heel?
I can't tell you exactly how to fix it, but maybe you are walking/running "wrong." In this same vein, there is no "right," either. Only you know what is going to work for you, but above all else you should not hurt. Being a marathoner is a fucking brutal hobby to pick up (seriously, were you out of stamps or coins?) but being a marathoner that is deliberately and ignorantly hurting themselves is downright retarded.
This week, and especially today on your 25 minute WALK (you'll run next week, be patient), pay attention to how you walk and if you experience pain. Make strides (FUCKING PUNNY, BITCHES!!!) to endure NO pain when you walk. Questions on how to get that done? There's a comments section below - but you all don't know that because I've only seen one fucking comment. This is about community, you mouth-breathers!
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